Another Day, Another Scammer...

Every so often, an author gets one of those emails — the kind that flatters your writing, claims to have a “private community” of thousands of readers, and promises algorithmic miracles if you’ll only reply “interested.”

I received one this morning, and instead of deleting it, I decided to translate it into its true meaning.

The Scam Email… Translated Into Plain English:

Hi Gill,

I found your book because I scraped Amazon for keywords like Victorian, forbidden love, and noble family drama. I have not read it, nor will I ever read it, but I’ve copied enough phrases from your blurb to sound like I have.

I run a “private community” of exactly 4,000 people, because that number sounds big but not too big. This community does not exist. What does exist is my desire for you to reply so I can begin the real pitch.

Our group is “faith oriented” because that phrase statistically increases author response rates. Also, it flatters you by implying your work has moral depth, which I have not verified because, again, I have not read it.

We offer “voluntary reader tips” because saying “fees” scares authors. Once you reply, I will explain that there is a small “administrative step” or “processing requirement” to get your book into our system. This fee will be between $50 and $300, depending on how hopeful you sound.

I am also throwing in words like “algorithm visibility,” “organic engagement,” and “guided reading conversations” because they sound like things a marketing professional might say. They are not.

If you reply “interested,” I will send you a long PDF full of vague promises, invented testimonials, and a payment link.

Warm regards,

A Man [maybe a woman] With a Gmail Account and No Scruples